"Be strong and Corageous" My last day with my darling...

On Tuesday we started a paper chase very early in the morning.  Today was the day that L could sign her letter of consent to be adopted.  It was a special moment.  She really wanted Iryna and me to be in the room with her but we were not allowed to stay.  I waited outside anxiously (mostly wishing I could be there to feed warmth to her heart about her decision).   

But in the end she came out of the room smiling!   We then ran around to different offices and to the courthouse to request a judge and a court date. 

I waited outside the court house (because I was not properly dressed for the court building) long enough to pace back and forth too many times… then venture a little further and pace back and forth some more… then walk laps around the play ground across the street…. I walked a lot… it was probably a good thing because I was feeling pretty suspenseful!   When Iryna came out she said we got the “good judge” the one she was hoping for!  Praise the Lord!!!

 

The Court house from my view as I was forbidden to enter while wearing  jean shorts.

The Courthouse doors

This playground was across from the court house... If we had playgrounds like these maybe I'd do better in the "Tough Mudder"! :)

We continued to chase papers until it was time for me to visit L in the evening for the last time.  I knew I would be getting on a train early the next morning to start my long journey back to the US. 

When I got to L’s school I was greeted by my favorite little class of munchkins… “L! L!”  “L’s momma! L’s momma!”  

 

 Jumps and hugs and giggles and snuggles and kisses… I really love love love these greetings!  At first I think their rowdiness and clinginess really irritated L (either she thought they were bothering me and she was trying to protect me or she just thought they were being bad, or she didn’t want to share her momma).   

But at some point when Yulia was able to translate for us, I was able to have a conversation with her about how I am now hers forever.  She now has her own family and momma and papa that will love her and hug her all the time.  She now has two sisters now that will adore her and a forever family…forever!  She gets to come home with us and have hugs and love all day long!  But many of her classmates don’t have that yet and we want to show them as much love as we can while we have the opportunity because we will leave them soon and with out a momma and papa to hug them.  At that point she was very understanding and never scolded them again for jumping on my lap or into my arms.  In fact…. She

was excited to take pictures of me with each of them and excited to pass out our special treats to them in turn.  What a sweet privilege it is to spend my days with L and her class! I now understand exactly why some saints go on a mission trip to minister to orphans and essentially never return! 

When it was time for me to leave, I could tell she was

stalling.  Really, I was too!  Her class was already getting washed up for supper and we were still putting her things back in her purse, slowly each thing…. Then she asked if she could paint my nails….. this would take more time… sure!  Why not?!  It took another 20 minutes!

Then slowly slowly we walked to the door… slowly slowly we walked up the stairs… slowly slowly we changed our shoes… slowly slowly we put our things away in her closet…. Sweetly sweetly we hugged and hugged… we didn’t want to let go.  I tried to assure her in my limited Russian that I will be back!  September 14 momma is coming!  And I will not leave you again!  I will think about you and pray for you constantly while I am back in the US with your sisters and papa.  Goodbye my darling daughter!  I love you love you love you!  How I wished that I had the words to tell her God’s promises “Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble …. for the LORD

your God is the one who goes with you. He will not fail you or forsake you!"

Really, I was likewise trying to comfort myself as I said goodbye to my sweet girl!  I love you! I love you! I love you!  I will come back for you!!! –love, Momma